Many clients think if they were more confident their career potential would improve greatly and their personal and social life would be far more satisfying and fun.
This may well be true as they would feel far better about themselves and therefore extend themselves more across a variety of situations.
My solution for building confidence is not difficult but also not comfortable; be willing to make mistakes.
Think about it. Whatever you do well now, there was a time when you didn’t. But you persisted until you became confident at it.
If it is something you learned as a child, you were free of exactly the self-conscious concepts that are undoubtably holding you back now.
- Perhaps you are holding some of these commonly held beliefs about making mistakes:
- Mistakes means failing and must be avoided.
- Making mistakes means I am stupid; others will think I am stupid; they will laugh at me
- Making mistakes means I am really a closet idiot, no matter what my position
- I will feel bad about it and must beat myself up for a long time
- I had a bad experience in the past and must protect myself
Actually, a mistake is merely an opportunity to do (whatever) differently next time. Mistakes grow you, shaping your character as you meet challenges with persistence.
When the fearful voice in your head starts playing old tapes about your ‘limitations’, hindering you from focusing away from yourself and onto the present moments activity, change the voice to Donald Duck and get on with the task at hand.
Really, the more mistakes you, the more you will learn, and the more confident you will become.
I hope this has been helpful to you.
Your comments or questions are most welcome.